Tickle me with a feather

It was a glorious sunny day at Mere View Bird Sanctuary. The sun shone from a sky lightly tufted with clouds, there was a gentle breeze rippling the skirts of female visitors (and one or two male ones from a specialist club on an annual outing) and the birds were, appropriately, singing.

Charlene was enjoying the sunshine and views, and the way the wind was rippling HER skirt. It was a reminder that she had dressed carelessly and was wearing no drawers. Beside a beautiful lake there was a sunlit bench, and Charlene sat down to take in the view. The whole rippling thing was still happening so she crossed her legs discreetly.

A few minutes later she noticed a man walking along the path towards her. He was dressed, and carrying round his neck a huge pair of binoculars, as well as a large camera with an enormous lens which swung at hip level like a massive signal of interest.
He smiled at her, a cheeky, lopsided smile due to the fact that he was chewing some gum.
“Fabulous view!” he commented as he got close
“Oh yes!” said Charlene, sensuously brushing a strand of hair away from her face. “I like to feel the fresh air” – and she smiled a little secret smile to herself.

The man sat down beside her, his camera on his lap and looking even more like a bid for attention, and delicately spat out the gum.

Charlene shaded her eyes with her hand (whilst still leaving a gap to see through) and studied the lake.
“Are you looking for something in particular?” he enquired
“I’m on the lookout for a shag”
There was a meaningful pause, during which the man adjusted his camera a few times.
“You’ll not get one here. Too far from the sea”

Charlene looked crestfallen, like a crested bird whose crest had fallen.
“I can tell you about the birds around here if you like” he offered, by way of consolation “I’ve got a lot of experience of them”
He pointed to a speck on the lake in the distance “That’s a goosander, a kind of duck”
Charlene squinted. “I can only see one bird” she said

The man introduced himself as Derek Whinchat, and added, slightly embarrassed, that he was a twitcher.
Charlene looked closely at him but could see no evidence of it: he was sitting quite still.
He was young and as far as she could see, quite fit, though much of his (probably) muscular torso was obscured by binoculars and camera. He had thick wavy hair which had restricted itself to his scalp, leaving his ruggedly handsome face exposed. His eyes twinkled, which was probably a trick of the bright sunshine, but had an extraordinary effect on Charlene. (She was still being rippled by the wind)

“I’m really looking out for a widgeon” he said. Charlene’s inner smile became broader.
“Really?”
“Yes. I love their pink-flushed breasts”
Charlene leaned towards him, breathing heavily. Everything was rippling
“Can you see any?”

He turned towards her. The huge lens pressed against her, and she jumped a little in surprise, her pink-flushed breasts jiggling distractingly.
“I believe I can” he whispered hoarsely. “A breeding pair”

“Do you think they might nest somewhere round here?” Charlene asked, looking up at him meaningfully through her lashes (which were of course long and luscious)
“I’d certainly like them to” he said, sliding an arm along the bench behind her. Fortunately it was his own arm.

A swan paddled across the lake. Charlene seized her moment
“Have you ever found a whooper?”
He shook his head. “I’d like to. Most are mute though. But once when I was looking for shags I got a bittern”
“Gosh!” Charlene looked shocked. “Did that hurt?”
He shrugged. It was all part and parcel of his passion. “I got it on here” he raised the camera with its massive lens.

“I don’t really know anything about birds – I just like it here” Charlene confessed.
“It’s easy to get started” he explained, leaning closer. “You just have to start taking notice of the important features, like for instance breasts” his eyes dropped lower, but luckily stayed in his head. He found he was staring at her important features, and felt a sudden urge to put his big lens to use
“I think I’ve just seen something beautiful and exotic. A nesting pair” he whispered,
“Really?” Charlene looked excited, and indeed the rippling breeze was doing its job well.
“Would you like to see them a bit closer?”
He nodded; his mouth felt dry. “Stop feeling it” he told himself. “It looks odd.”
“Let’s take a walk, there’s a hide nearby, where I can get closer to them without us being seen”

They walked a short distance away from the lake. His camera was swinging at a jauntier than usual angle. When they were safely concealed in the hide, he put down his equipment and took her close into his arms.
“careful of your camera!” she exclaimed, and was then astonished to see it on the floor.
“Oh gosh!” She blushed, and then glanced down at his zoom function, and felt those familiar ripples flooding through her.

“Oh Derek!” she cried, and as he pointed to his spotted redshank she gave out a little auk.

That day, Charlene learned that, even amongst all those exotic birds, one swallow can be very special..