Araminta had never been camping before; her holidays had most definitely involved very comfortable hotels.
She was accustomed to soft beds and firm masseurs, hot showers and cool drinks, spas and wristbands which gave her everything she could want.
However, she had girlfriends with other ideas, and Araminta was not inclined to miss out on fun, even at a personal cost to herself.
She was determined to be as prepared as possible, and took herself off to the Wild ‘n’ Wet camping store for some advice.
Not having any clothing appropriate to a weekend in a field, she arrived in her customary teetering heels, and the resultant wiggle of buttage as she walked around generated immediate interest in her as a customer.
The young man in charge of the camping department watched her for a while, concluding very quickly that she was new to outdoor activities, but allowing her to wander for some time because, as an outdoorsy fellow, he liked to savour the view. Finally he strode up, looking manly and rugged in his jeans, check shirt and jawline.
“Can I help you?” he asked – always a good opening line in such circumstances. Araminta turned, and gave a melting sigh of relief, which, in its breathiness, caused a little thrill to run through the man’s veins.
“Oh yes please!” she exclaimed. “My friends want to go on a camping weekend, and I’ve never done anything like that before!”
The man raised his eyebrows (they were getting in the way) and said “Really?” in as unsurprised fashion as he could manage.
“Where are you going?” He asked her. She turned, startled. “I was just going to look at that tent” she replied, nervously
“I meant, where are you going camping?” he explained, to discover just how serious the kit would need to be.
They weren’t going too far, and only for a weekend.
Araminta spotted a tent which took her eye: It had a large sleeping area opening onto a central space, and a big awning over the door. She explored it excitedly, exclaiming “I think I could get used to this!”
The young man paused for a significant moment before saying “This is quite a big tent for a starter. How many of you will be sleeping in it?”
“Oh it’s just for me” Araminta replied, carelessly
“Will you be able to put it up on your own?”
There was a shocked pause. Araminta hadn’t thought of that. She hesitated. “Oh. I just assumed there would be a man there who could get it up for me”
The young man smiled, thinking that this had probably been her experience to date. “You might be lucky” he said, but generally you have to do it yourself”
That changed everything. Araminta looked crestfallen, especially as the young man, who introduced himself as (of course) Guy, led her to a range of far smaller tents, like little crysalises.
“This is more the sort of thing you’ll want” he explained. Araminta looked very disappointed, but when he told her they were self erecting she perked up and was keen to have a look inside them. “They are roomier than they look” he assured her. She reached down and, hooking a long red nail into the back of one of her long red stilettoes, flicked it off, followed by the other. The shoes lay in a higgledy-piggledy little heap on a display groundsheet. As Guy watched, momentarily unable to breathe, Araminta crouched down onto the floor, onto her hands and knees to peep through the flap of the nearest little tent. Her jeans were fitting closely around her rumpulars, and when she went into her hands and knees, the effect was mesmerising. Guy watched her cheeks roll over each other as she crawled forward, savouring the calliypygously elumptious view. As she murmured cautious appreciation, behind her Guy was experiencing what in the trade is known as “Freestanding Tent”
After a few moments Araminta reversed back out of the tent, and action so mesmerizingly delicious as to require Guy to walk around a bit, staring at the ceiling. By the time he had turned full circle Araminta was just getting to her feet. Her face rose upwards right in front of him, her eyeline pausing briefly as it swept over his flyline. She had noticed his ridgepole.
“It does look rather cosy, I must say!” she exclaimed, smoothing her clothes down in a way which was not helpful. They were already clingy and this just encouraged them. Some pieces of clothing seemed to be wrapping themselves prospectively around her heaving by bustage with unnecessary enthusiasm.
“So, let’s go over some of the other…equipment which will help me settle in”
Guy nodded, and walked carefully over to another part of the shop.
“You’re going to need something for cooking. You’ll find you get very hungry being out in the country.”
Araminta nodded; “When I’m out in the country I always get utterly ravished!”
There was a little pause. “I think you mean famished…?” suggested Guy, cautiously. Araminta shot him a glance: “I know what I mean” she replied firmly “And it makes me very hungry”
“Here’s what you need then. Billycan”
“I’m sorry – I thought you said your name was Guy”
He held out the steel item to show her. She smiled coyly, and then leaned towards him and said quietly “I’d be more interested to know if Guycan…”
Guy felt himself flush pink, but only for a moment before all the blood was urgently required elsewhere.
Araminta explained that she thought they would be eating meals at a nearby pub, so cooking equipment was unnecessary.
“OK. So…what about bedding?” he asked “That’s very important”
Araminta couldn’t agree more, so they took a look at some of the displays
“Do you see anything here which you like the look of?” asked Guy
“In terms of bedding you mean?”
“Yes”
The conversation had got awfully meaningful and seemed to exist on two entirely separate levels. Guy was distracted by thoughts of wild camping in secret deep gorges…
“Yes. I’ve got some ideas, but you see I’m so inexperienced that I need advice”
Guy struggled to accept that notion, but offered his help anyway. “You want something that will keep you nice and warm -” Araminta nodded enthusiastically – “so I’d like you to take a look at this mummybag”
Araminta was keen to do so; and only slightly less so when she realised it was a kind of sleeping bag.
“It’s very narrow” she objected.
“It goes very closely around your body. Like this” he moved his hands symmetrically down either side of her body, tracing her volupinaceous curves in the air. She looked thoughtfully at him with an air of consternation, and then said “You’ll only fit one person in there”
“It’s only meant for one person”
Araminta burst out laughing. “But this is supposed to be a holiday!” she exclaimed.
“Will you want an airbed?” he asked her
“Is that what you suggest?”
Guy told her that he did: he told her that in fact when he was a lad he regularly had a Li-Lo at the weekends. Araminta looked puzzled “Is that like Lola?” she asked him. He explained it was an old established brand of airbed, and suggested she try one out to experience its comforts.
“We have one blown up you can lie on”. It was inside one of the display tents; Guy pointed to it. Araminta did her distressing hands-and-knees thing again, though it was not strictly necessary this time as the doorway was much higher. But she had been amused by its effect. Guy said “I’ll come after you” which Araminta considered was very thoughtful, and was very nearly true.
He edged round the far side of the airbed, and, putting his strong, muscular – yet sensitive – hand on the rubber, gave a firm squeeze as he explained “You have to check them regularly. I gave this a good pumping earlier. Ah great! Still nice and firm. You like them firm?”
Araminta nodded eagerly. Yes she did.
“So, climb onto it and get comfortable” he advised. Araminta did so, thinking as she did so that camping was not such unfamiliar territory after all. She wriggled into a good position, giggling a little at the noises the airbed made as she moved.
“Are they all this loud?” she asked
He nodded. “Every one seems to make more noise IN a tent than out of it”
Araminta considered this. “It must be the effect of the fresh air” she answered. Guy didn’t really follow her meaning, but he didn’t care as he was fully engaged (or indeed, engorged) in watching the lusciousness that was Araminta wriggling her lusciously lush physique all over the airbed, savouring the unfamiliar experience.
“You’ll soon get used to it. The way when you squash it down in one place it pops up in another”
“Oh I’m used to that” she assured him
“Do you want me to show you how to pump it up?” he asked, but Araminta simply said that she was completely certain she could manage that
“What about letting it go down afterwards?”
Araminta said she generally left things to do that themselves
Very soon Araminta understood the basics of camping. She had never had trouble pulling on guys, and once she had learned about ripstop nylons, and therefore didn’t have to worry about snags, she felt she would be able to really enjoy herself.
Guy was a knowledgeable and experienced teacher too: he had spent his teenage years playing tents and had a confidence with his tent pole which was inspirational.
It wasn’t long before he had showed Araminta how good he was with a stuff sack. The whole experience was intense